Hawkenfighten

This weekend as I was engaging in one of my more retiree-oriented hobbies (filling a bird feeder), I observed a tiny red-breasted nuthatch snacking away on peanuts eight feet from where I stood. He was adorable and fairly tame, so I was kind of bummed when a sharp-shinned hawk swooped down from my neighbor’s tree and snatched him, flying just three feet from my face.

It’s a good thing I wasn’t wearing my San Diego Chicken mask.

Still, seeing such a skilled predator in action was exciting. Especially since we live on a city lot the size of a carpet sample. Although next time, Mrs. Hawk? I suggest the highly snackable house sparrow instead. I hear they taste like popcorn. Or, if you want something meatier, try a starling casserole.

There’s no way I can segue from that, so I’ll just jump right into my next topic. There is a restaurant in Milwaukee that has lately gained a very negative reputation—perhaps because within a recent two-month timeframe, police were called to the location something like 18 times. Primarily due to auto-related incidents (theft, accidents, and vandalism), although fighting in the restaurant was also a major cause of police visits. One of these fights involved forty people grappling and throwing plates, silverware, chairs, and punches. Things have gotten so bad that a city alderman is campaigning to shut down the restaurant entirely.

You’d think that this restaurant is of the George Webb-strain, serving omelettes and pancakes to drunk patrons at 3 in the morning, right?

Wrong. Can you guess what this restaurant is? If you know, leave it in the comments. No fair Googling. If nobody guesses correctly, I’ll post the answer by tomorrow.